Friday's Stupid Pictures

"In The News" Thursday

'nuff said

Those Polish folk...

Wait, what???

New Drinking Game

TACOMA, Wash. - Two Washington state residents have been charged with assault for allegedly throwing rocks off an Interstate 5 overpass during a game that involved stripping.
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Twenty-three-year-old Josh Sizemore and 18-year-old Amanda Madison were charged with 14 counts of assault, one for each of the cars the rocks hit.
They both pleaded not guilty to the charges.
Sizemore is being held on $40,000 bail, and she's being held on $50,000. Neither has a prior conviction.
Investigators say the pair was caught in the act by a Washington State Patrol plane.
Fourteen drivers claimed their cars were hit with rocks dropped from a railroad trestle over I-5 early in the morning of Memorial Day.
Sizemore admits he dropped rocks onto I-5, but claims he never intentionally threw a rock at any cars.
In an interview Sizemore said they were playing a game called "Sex Me."
He described the game this way: If you see a car with a headlight out, and if you yell "Sex me!" first, the other person has to take a piece of clothing off.
She was down to her underwear when they got busted.
He said the game had nothing to do with the rocks.
Hitting cars with the rocks was just something they were doing because they "were bored."
"I know I am sorry, but I don't know how I could express to anyone the amount I feel," he said. "I'm sorry because I didn't think."
Sizemore claims the two had been drinking and didn't think about the potential for danger until after about half an hour.
The 23-year-old, who has a daughter, says there's no excuse for his behavior and he's prepared to be punished for it by spending years locked up.
Sizemore says he never intentionally tried to hit a car.
"I was trying to pass time," he said. "I don't know why I did it."
(Copyright NBC Newschannel, All Rights Reserved)

Today's Darwin Award Goes To....

(13 January 2008, Florida) Wearing only swim trunks and sneakers, a 37-year-old man raced his motorcycle toward the Manasota Key drawbridge. As the bridge began to open, it was clear that he intended to "shoot the gap." Bridge designers had anticipated such lunacy and invented the crossing guard. The closing gates swept him off his Suzuki, over the side of the bridge, into the water, and out of the gene pool. By a twist of fate the motorcycle continued up the ramp and made it across to the other side.

(article from www.darwinawards.com)

Walking across false ceilings is very, very dangerous. Please use caution and wear knee pads if necessary.

A crook trying to evade police crashed through a ceiling and landed right at the feet of the cops searching for him, according to UPI.

Police were searching for a burglar at an eyewear store. That explains why he didn’t see the “Warning: False ceiling” sign.

Then the man they were looking for fell through the ceiling and landed right in front of the police officers making it the shortest foot chase in history.

(article from www.dumbcriminals.com)

Woman Beaten Up Over Asparagus Prices

BERLIN (Reuters) – German police are searching for a motorist who beat a 24-year-old woman selling white asparagus because he was upset about her asking price for the coveted springtime vegetable, police said on Monday.
The prices for white asparagus, sometimes called "edible ivory" in Germany, fluctuate wildly during the short springtime season, peaking early in the season at 10 euros per kilo.
The man screamed at the woman that her asparagus was overpriced. He then punched her in the face and threatened to unleash his attack dog at her. She fled and called police.
"The motorist said her prices were totally over the top," said Dietmar Keck, police spokesman in the Havelland district west of Berlin, without saying how much she was asking.
Prices for asparagus now range from 1 to 5 euros per kilo, he said. Some 55,000 tons valued at 175 million euros are harvested annually.
(Writing by Jacob Comenetz; Editing by Louise Ireland)

Friday's Stupid Pictures

"In The News" Thursday

Stupid Criminal Of The Day

THINK OUTSIDE THE BRAIN It’s no surprise that America has an unhealthy attitude with fast food. It’s not only bad for your digestive system, a major contributor to obesity and a cause of most long-term diseases, but it evidently also messes up your brain.

A man who led police on a 90 mph chase got caught because he stopped to grab a burrito from Taco Bell, according to the Fort Wayne Journal Gazette.The man was wanted on multiple warrants and refused to pull over when an officer attempted a traffic stop. Maybe he was just looking for a place to park really, really fast?

The chase came to an end when he pulled into the Taco Bell parking lot and ordered a burrito. Police later arrested him. He said he stopped because he knew he was going to prison and wanted just one last delicious bite of a Taco Bell burrito. I smell a new ad campaign in the works.

Today's Darwin Award Goes To...

(26 August 2006, Leicester, England) Darren's death was a mystery. The 33-year-old was found slumped in the hallway of his house, bleeding from stab wounds to his chest. Police initially assumed that an assailant had attacked him, but they could find no supporting evidence. A year later, the inquest revealed why Darren can stake his claim to a place among the winners of the Darwin Award.

Darren had called a friend, but minutes after he hung up, rang back to ask for an ambulance. The front door was ajar, and Darren was found lying near a bloodstained lock-knife he had purchased whilst on holiday in Spain. Forensics investigators saw no indication of a struggle, and the coroner reported that the stab wounds seemed to be self-inflicted. However, Darren had shown no suicidal tendencies.

His wife, who was on holiday at the time of the incident, cleared up the mystery, and revealed why our subject will go down in history as a Darwin Award winner. As she was leaving for the holiday, she remembered Darren wondering whether his new jacket was 'stab-proof'.

That's right. Darren decided to find out if his jacket could withstand a knife attack. Did he choose to test his jacket while it was draped over the back of a chair? No, our man thought that the best approach would be to wear the garment and stab himself. Sadly, his choice of armor proved less resistant to a sharp blade than he had hoped.

The coroner reached a verdict of accidental death by 'misadventure'

MEOW.... Oh wait............

MICHIGAN - Warren, Michigan police responded to a 911 call about a cougar on the prowl.
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"It's huge; it's like a 150-pound cat," the caller told the operator. About 10 officers arrived at Bates Park on 14 Mile Road east of Van Dyke and saw what looked like a big cat in an old cement drainpipe. "And I went back behind there and shined a light there - and it's in there," said the caller.
Warren police shot a Taser at the animal - hitting what turned out to be a large toy cougar. Police Commissioner William Dwyer said officials now believe the incident was a prank, but he said his department could not take any chances since it was near a playground. "We did what we had to do. We want to keep the city safe," said Dwyer. Dwyer said the prank cost the city more than $1,000 in wasted police hours between the response from 10 officers and the paperwork they had to file. If the prankster is caught, he or she could have to pay the city back for the wasted police officers and could face 90 days probation.
(Copyright NBC News Channel, All Rights Reserved)

Banana used as gun in holdup, then eaten

WINSTON-SALEM, N.C. – Authorities in North Carolina say a store owner and a patron thwarted a teen accused of trying to carry out a robbery by concealing a banana beneath his shirt to resemble a gun.

Winston-Salem authorities say 17-year-old John Szwalla entered the Internet cafe Thursday and demanded money, saying he had a gun.

The owner, Bobby Ray Mabe, said he and a customer jumped Szwalla, holding him until deputies arrived. While they waited, Mabe says the teen ate the banana.

Mabe says deputies took pictures of the peel. Forsyth County Sheriff's office spokesman Maj. Brad Stanley says deputies joked about charging Szwalla with destroying evidence.

Szwalla faces a charge of attempted armed robbery. Jail officials say he doesn't have an attorney.

Wouldn't you be?

Well, gee, thanks.

Thursday's "In The News" and Friday's Pictures

Didn't get to the computer yesterday...enjoy a double! It's creative, I guess...

Really? Office furniture?

Stupid Criminal of the Day

Cell phones have done some great things in their time. They help us communicate with each other all over the globe. They allow us to access information at the touch of a button. They lead police to the identity of car thieves.

One car thief left his cell phone in a stolen car that he wrecked that contained several pictures of himself, according to the Houston Chronicle.The guy broke into a car and then wrecked it and fled the scene. If you’re going to steal a car, make sure you know how to drive it. That’s why you don’t see lopsided fat guys stealing pogo sticks.

Unfortunately, his cell phone had his picture all over it and now it’s all over the news media. It could have been worse. He could have left his driver’s license. I’m talking about both for his picture and his waining level of intelligence.

(article from www.dumbcriminals.com)

Today's Darwin Award Goes To...

(2 February 2008, New York) A 50-year-old man was bird hunting in Upstate New York with his buddies and his faithful canine companion. They stopped for a smoke, and his dog found a deer leg bone!

The man tried to take the bone away, but like any right thinking dog, the animal would not relinquish its treasure. He stayed just out of reach. Frustrated with this blatant show of disobedience, the man grabbed his loaded shotgun by the muzzle and began wielding it like a club. Each time he swung it, the dog dodged.

Suddenly the "club" struck the ground and fired, shooting the man in the abdomen. He was airlifted to a nearby hospital, where he died from his injuries. He did remain conscious long enough to confirm this account to police; otherwise, his poor friends might now be under suspicion!

At least he didn't hit the dog.

(article from www.darwinawards.com)

Chuck Norris Protects Bakery

Store bosses have seen off burglars by placing a life-sized photo of Hollywood action star Chuck Norris in the window.

The posh bakery shop in Split, Croatia, had been broken into almost every week until they put up the poster of the karate champ with a sign saying: "This shop is under the protection of Chuck Norris."

Now the bakery hasn't had a single burglary for more than a month.

Sales assistant Mirna Kovac said: "To be honest we just started it as a joke but it really has worked. Thieves haven't been anywhere near us for ages. People seem to respect him.

"Everyone around here has seen his films and he's quite a popular character, perhaps even among criminals, so they've decided to leave us alone."

She added though: "We have had a few customers come in and ask us whether they can get Chuck's autograph. They really believe he is sitting in our storeroom out the back ready to pounce on any burglars."

(article from www.Ananova.com)

Friday's Stupid Pictures

Common Sense: More Rare Than You Think

That's SOME Dentist!

Again, Thank You...

Good Samaritan Gone Wrong

"In The News" Thursday

Yay!

Um, wtf?


"If you can't see well, learn sign language" -Danielle
"If you can't walk-try running." -Shanna
"If you have blood sugar you take a knife and make a cut and then let it bleed so the sugar runs out. I read this in a pirate book." -Dexter

Cruel, cruel children...

Today's Darwin Award Goes To...

(27 December 2008, Serbia) 23-year-old Strahinja Raseta was wanted by Croatian police for murder, as well as for a spectacular robbery of a central post office. He fled to Serbia to evade the law.

But even bad guys have friends. Raseta had a friend, and his friend had lent him E15,000. Some loans can never be repaid. This was such a loan. Finding himself unable to earn or steal the funds needed to reimburse his friend, Raseta attempted to end the matter in another way--by murdering the lender!

He crawled under his creditor's Jeep and planted an explosive. However, the muffler was still hot, and the heat set off the explosive while Raseta was beneath the vehicle. He died in hospital the next day in the Serbian capital city of Belgrade, illustrating the truth of the biblical adage, "Neither a borrower nor a lender be."

Stupid Criminal of the Day

Why do so many suspects leave behind personal information at the scene of their crimes? It’s the same thing as going to the police department, telling them the crime you committed and leaving your name and phone number with their secretary on one of those pink “While You Were Out” sheets.

One suspect left behind a personal notebook at the scene of their crime, according to the Neshoba Democrat.In this case, the robber in question robbed a woman of her purse in a church. So either this guy was really stupid or karma does exist.

The man entered the church with a basket of clothing he wanted to donate, but he left it behind at the scene with a personal notebook on top of it. The notebook had his name written on the cover. The only way this could have been sweeter is if police discovered his name because he had written it on his underwear.

(article from www.dumbcriminals.com)

Drunk Urban Cowboy

ARVADA, COLORADO - The sight of the horse and rider in the strip mall gathered a crowd of cell phone-wielding onlookers just as police arrived.

"It was the absolute funniest thing I've ever seen," said Amie Bergondo, an instructor at Dance Boulevard. "There was a horse pulled over in the parking lot."

Officers came to a parking lot at the corner of 64th Avenue and Ward Road responding to a call of a cowboy who couldn't stay in the saddle. Brian Drone of Arvada was ticketed for riding an animal while under the influence, a Class B traffic violation resulting in a $25 fine.

While police determined what to do with Drone and his "designated driver," the crowd moved in for a closer look. Both Drone and his horse proved game.

Kersta LaFleur convinced her daughter, Jenna, to settle for a snapshot. "She wanted to ride the horse," said LaFleur, shaking her head. "No, no," she said. "The cops were not thrilled with that."

Arvada Police Sgt. Jeff Monzingo says this drunk riding charge was the first he'd seen in his 15 years in law enforcement. "This is kind of a tricky call," Monzingo said. "Unlike in a DUI where you can tow a car, we had to do something with the horse."

Monzingo said a local stable owner who knows Drone offered to give the wayward rider and his mount a ride home. Drone declined a request for an interview other than to say he and his horse "Cricket" were out on a "joyride."

"I've seen him do it before," said Penny Lackey, a waitress at Cucina Roma Roma.

"The first time was very usual," she said. "The second time, I was like, 'OK, there's the guy on the horse again.'" That's not to say Lackey doesn't admit to watching the scene outside the restaurant window along with her customers. "One of my tables was from out of town, and they said, 'You don't see that everyday,'" Lackey said.

"Only in Arvada," said Alaya Overfelli, the owner of Cucina Roma Roma, who added that he declined Drone's offer to get on his horse for a photo.

Overfelli seemed most concerned for the horse.

"He was thirsty. I gave him some water," said Overfelli with a laugh. "Not beer, no."

(Copyright KUSA*TV, All Rights Reserved)

Friday's Stupid Pictures